Broken record time... I cannot believe that it is almost Christmas. Which means that Isla is almost 3 months old. And we are almost to 2015.
The last few months since Isla was born are basically a blur. Each in our own way we have had to adjust to being a family of 5 and life with a newborn. Luckily the boys both adore Isla.
But as much as this little guy loves his baby (and believe me he loves her with intensity), he has not loved the fact that he is no longer the baby in the house. So from time to time, we let Ari be baby Ari. And that seems to help.
But whenever I'm tied down taking care of my
actual baby, Ari is usually off wreaking havoc somewhere else in the house. He is known for making make-shift ladders to access anything we have put on a high shelf specifically to keep it out of his reach (think scissors, sharpies, medicine, candy, matches, razors, etc. etc.). He has figured out how to crack every child-safety contraption out there. He is the most curious and independent child I have ever known. So he is into everything.... every drawer, every cupboard, every toilet, every nook and cranny in our home.
Punishments don't really work with him either. He will willingly sit in time out. He is the first to say sorry to you and to promise that he will never be naughty again. And he does it so sweetly and sincerely that you want to believe him. But you can't. Because he will come out of timeout and repeat the same naughty behavior that he just got in trouble for and then look sincerely surprised when you get mad at him again.
He keeps me on my toes and can be totally exhausting. I worry about him and his safety all the time. But I also think he is hilarious and admire his independent streak and can relate to his curiosity about the world and don't want him to lose it. I'm just hoping that he learns to use these same powers for good as he gets older.
It's also a blessing that he is exceptionally cute.
Kai takes advantage of me being busy in an entirely different way. He knows just when to ask sweetly for "quiet time" which is our euphemism for TV time around here. Whether I allow Kai to sit in front of the TV or not, he inevitably spends a good chunk of the day entertaining himself while I am taking care of his siblings. Kai has always been independent so there are times he would probably choose to be by himself, but I feel guilty about it nonetheless.
When Kai isn't spending time alone, he is often stepping up as the big brother and mommy's little helper. In fact, he is so good at being helpful most of the time and is generally so well behaved, that sometimes Yo and I forget that he is just barely 5 and not a little man. We have such high expectations of this kid and sometimes come down on him too fast and too hard when he is simply acting his age. But that is something we are working on and I've tried to make a point of just holding Kai (with all of his squirminess and protesting) at least a couple of times today to appreciate his littleness for as long as it lasts.... and I hope it lasts a while yet.
As a mom I have felt stretched thinner than ever. Every night I go to bed worrying about whether I had enough quality time with the boys. Whether they spent too much time in front of the TV? Whether they ate enough vegetables, got enough hugs, got any time outside. Or whether I lost my patience too often. Most days I feel like I'm not making the grade. But I am trying my best and have tried extra hard not to drop the ball on the bigger events.
First there was Halloween:
Kai was quite adamant about being a dragon this year. Ari had no preference on his costume yet so he went as a monster. I chose his costume because it made me laugh and seemed fitting for his personality. He's cute. Funny. And a total monster.
I definitely scaled back on Halloween this year. We carved a pumpkin, attended the ward Halloween activity, went to a fall festival and took the kids trunk-or-treating. Done and done.
Then there was Kai's birthday:
It's crazy the things that mommy-guilt will get you to do. As much as I didn't want to throw Kai a party, (mostly because it would require getting dressed... just kidding...not really!) I didn't want Kai to feel like he got the shaft two years in a row. (Last year we moved to Colorado the day before his birthday and had a pitiful celebration in a hotel room.)
It wasn't my best work. We set out to have a dragon theme and ended up doing a Spider Man party when dragon decorations were in short supply. I settled for a store bought cake instead of one of my usual homemade labors of love. I pinterest stole a few game ideas that took as little preparation as possible. But Kai had friends, cake and a pinata, so at the end of the day he was one happy birthday boy. And I would count that as a success.
I was so busy running around playing cruise director that I didn't take one single picture of the party. Yo was busy much of the time dealing with a fussy Isla but he managed to join us for cake and took just enough pictures so that we can prove to Kai that he was loved and not totally neglected the year that his sister was born.
Nothing says happy birthday like a provocative Spider Man
Luckily my parents swooped into town the week of Thanksgiving and gave me a little reprisal from most of my motherly duties and all of my mommy-guilt. I spent a good chunk of the week up in my bedroom feeding Isla and helping soother her when she was fussy, which was a chunk of the time (a separate post on that to follow).
My mom cooked, cleaned, entertained the boys, went grocery shopping, and orchestrated our entire Thanksgiving dinner. I felt spoiled and it was heavenly. I'm afraid that it may not have been much of a vacation for my non-stop mother, but I hope that she knows how much her help was appreciated. I really am the luckiest. My dad read to the kids and rough housed and watched football and kept my mom company. Yo was reminded yet again that he scored in the in-law department. And the kids were in heaven getting some quality time in with Grandma and Grandpa. The first thing that Ari asked every morning that they were here is, "Where's Grandma? Where's Grandpa?" and for several days after they left.
I took not one darn picture of my parents with the kids, but made up for it by having my amazing friend Josie take some family pictures of us. (Also deserving of its own post.... to follow).
